I’m exhausted. I don’t know what has happened lately, but I am feeling like things are too busy around here. I don’t know if it’s my schedule, the pregnancy factor, or the sick factor (I’ve had a cold for a week and a half that I can’t kick), but something has got to give! I always had visions of having so much more time on my hands once my girls started school and that has NOT been the case. Of course, Ellie is only in school until 12:30 and Addison only goes for a few hours a few days a week. I feel like by the time I drop Addison off it’s time to turn around and pick her up again. Our afternoons have been so busy with swim lessons, gymnastics, dancing, church stuff, play dates, homework (yes – I’m already complaining about homework and my child is in Kindergarten). It seems like I’m always rushing my girls – “get dressed, grab your stuff, were late late late, we’ll eat in the car, where are your shoes, go go go!” We have way too much going on for a 3 and 5 year old. And way too much going on for this thirty-two twenty-something year old.
Then there are the doctor appointments. I have been LIVING at the doctor’s office lately.
-regular pregnancy visits
-extra visits sparked on by trip to Emergency Room
-my flu shot
-girls’ flu shots
-family’s swine flu shots
-girls’ yearly allergy appointment
-follow up to Addie’s flu shot
-Addie’s ear ache appointment
-my TB test (to be able to volunteer at Ellie’s school)
-annual skin app.
There have been more appointments than that but my brain is too fried right now to remember the rest. A reminder from my girls’ dentist – “time for your 6 month check-up!” – came in the mail tonight. I told Kenny I’m done. The appointment will have to be made during a time when he can take them. Cause here’s the story with taking my girls to the doctor. It is inevitable that when I have the girls with me, the wait to see the doctor is forever long. I can only keep them occupied with snacks and coloring for so long before their wildness comes out. They can’t hold still. They can’t talk quietly. They can’t not touch things they shouldn’t touch. And very shortly I become exhausted from trying to keep them contained. At our last appointment before the doctor left the room she said good-bye to my girls, glanced at my stomach, and said “you’re gonna have your hands full.”
Well just great. I already feel like I have my hands full. And my plate is full. And something has got to give. My girls don’t have enough time to be home. To play pretend. To color and create. And I don’t have enough time to be home. To clean and organize. To fix healthy snacks. To work on my projects and create. So I pulled Ellie out of gymnastics (which made me sad because she enjoys it and is good at it) and I’m looking at what else we can do to re-adjust our schedule so that we have more down time at home. Plus it’s November. I love November. It’s the month to focus on gratitude and to be home and cozy with the fireplace on. Well, except that in San Diego there’s really no need for a fireplace. But it sounded good. I was also hoping that November would allow me some time to get a jump start on shopping and projects and card making for December so that I can truly enjoy the holiday season and not feel rushed and stressed.
So far, November is off to a rocky start. And I’m already feeling rushed and stressed. And I just don’t have my usual stamina these days. And I’m realizing that I won’t have my usual stamina for the next two or so years. Because this is what happens when you get pregnant and have a baby. Wonderful as it is, life is crazy. And I’m gonna have my hands full.
So…I have a sister who had fertility issues for years and then she had her kids…bam, bam, bam! And when she got the “hands full” thing from people. She replied, “It’s better than empty!” So very, very true:) It sounds like you are on the right track with xing the gymnastics…now…what else can go??
So Matt says today, “Hey, it’s really time to slow down. We need to re-focus on getting the house in order again. You are always on the run….oh by the way, it’s employee appreciation week at the office. Can you bake 10loaves of bread for me to take to work for Friday?”
All I can say is, I empathize. It’s hard to focus on where you are needed the most. Find your happy place. Volunteer work and lessons are great if that fills your cup. But it seems like your happy place is creating a comfortable and happy atmosphere for your family. Your girls will most likely remember that the most as well.
I think it’s our age…. I hate to think that, but I’m 10 years older then the first time I was pregnant. My life is a little different now. If it makes you feel any better, you’re still smoking hot!!!! Hang in there sweetie!!!
I hear you loud and clear!! I don’t have my kids involved in that many things, but it all takes time and can become so overwhelming. It really is such a struggle to find a balance, but they are little and really don’t need to be involved in a lot, I totally agree that they just need time to be kids. We have to enjoy it while we can.
This makes me sad to read. I wish you could just drop off the kids when you need to run to the doctor. All I can do is give you some advice from Santa Clara.
Two things to remember:
1-They won’t always be this hard to handle. It gets easier.
2- You are the one in charge of the schedule. Some things you have to do…like doctor etc. But others are not necessary if it means a stressed out mom. Clear you schedule….and then come home for a rest! I will make you feel like you are at a spa!
My first thought when reading this is cut out all the extra ‘stuff.’ Ellie loves gymnastics but let’s face it….she is 5. She has plenty more years in her life to take gymnastics.
I was also going to say, why are you volunteering? Well, I know why. It’s that mommy obligation you feel inside. So volunteer, but keep it at once a month or something that is do-able. I did once a month for Seth last year. It was perfect for me and he didn’t notice that it was only once a month! Ellie will not sit down with you when she’s a teenager or when she’s a mom and say, “Mom, if only you had volunteered in my kindergarten class more often than I would be happier.” You know? It’s hard but we have to keep perspective.
Last thing, please, please know that you can drop off girls at this crazy house ANY time. They would love it, you know it.
Love you Erin!
This is why I have given up on lots and lots of things in my life–at least for 10 years until they are all in school full-time :) Hang in there. Pregnancy is the WORST!
It seems as though life goes in fast forward for a bit and then we have some real slow motion times too. It truly is amazing how busy life can get with only 2 kids. I’m often wondering how parents do it with more kids!!
Coming from a family of 11 kids I thought I would be able to handle about 8 kids! Hahaha! 3 will do! I have to admit I love being out of the diaper stage! But it is still a busy time because 3 are a fun hands full!
Thanks for the good reminder that I should stick with the 2 kids! ;) It will get better, you ARE the super mom, and you’re just tired. You can do it, you are awesome! My only suggestion is to try and do the extra activities 1 at a time. If Ellie loves gymnastics, I’d keep her in and maybe just do swimming in the summer time. I have found with Pierce that it works great to have swim in summer, baseball in spring and soccer in fall. That way he gets to do it all, but it’s spread through out the year. But with things like dance or gymnastics, that go all year- maybe just do one at a time until they are a little older?
Or…you could just buy a lot on our street (even though the one next to use it taken, there are still 2 left!) then I could watch the girls anytime and we could car-pool! hhhmmmm….And you could come over for dinner, I’d randomly drop sugar cookies off, I could pick up what you need at Costco, save you a trip, movie nights to relax, I’d even come vacuum your floor when your belly gets to big….
Ick…you are making me dizzy just reading that email Sis. Slow the hell down. What good are friendships if you can’t ask for help once in a while – take Shari up on her offer to watch the girls for your next dr. appointment. I used to treat my OBGYN appts like a little spa trip when I was pregnant…get mani/pedi after or just a smoothie… BY YOURSELF! Leave the kids with a sitter and carve some time to relax and bond with new baby, even for just 30 minutes. A rested mom is a happy mom. ps. I’m going to come and see you after Christmas to help out and reorganize your entire life for you. Watch out!
Yes….what Carly said. I demand that you go to all of your Dr. appts BY YOURSELF and that you go get a pedicure after each one.
I am at Vons about 10 times per week. I can pick up stuff for you.
Heck, I can come change the oil in your car if you need me to!
xoxo
i am no means an expert, but as a mom of 3 here are a few of my golden rules: one activity per kid at a time, no playdates on the weekdays (mine are all in school), take a mental health day whenever needed (i work part time), never forget the vitamins, have no guilt in the word “no”.
I have to say you sure make it look easy. You are doing great.
Well I love all the comments and I am proud of you for pulling Ellie out and making changes that will help. One thing per kid works for me and I am lucky enough to have the one thing for both boys be the same thing at the same time at least thus far… And as far as people’s comments–it is better to have full hands than empty ;). You are awesome, take care of yourself.
Erin-Are you shocked to hear from me? :) I actually checked your blog!!! I go through this all the time. Every so often I have to re-asess and cut out the extra noise-which as you know is why I took comments off my blog, quit checking everyone’s blogs, got off facebook. You are smart that you are realizing what you need to do in your life and are doing it! Enjoy your girls!!!
BTW, when I was pregnant with Jake and at the pediatrician with my two others, she (not my normal doctor!!!!) said the same thing to me…”You have your hands full.” Nice!
I hear you. I’m to tired and sick to blog even. So your doing much better than I am. That should help…